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Juanita
Member in Phase 3
| Joined: | Thu May 3rd, 2007 |
| Location: | Alberta Canada |
| Posts: | 287 |
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Posted: Tue Oct 27th, 2009 23:45 |
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As of today, Oct. 27, 2009, I have been on the protocol for 2 years, 2 months and 20 days. And finally I am ready to state firmly that I know.... KNOW... now that the MP works for me.
I have been seriously ill for seventeen years, although I had a childhood of fragile health. In the Fall of 1992, I had an accident with a screen door window and needed surgery. I came out of the anesthesia with MCS, CFS, fibromyalgia, and a slow trickling bleed in my brain that took me a few weeks to realize had happened.
In the fifteen years prior to discovering the Marshall Protocol, we'd done everything from high dose antibiotics, homeopathy, high dose herbal tinctures, colon cleanses, acupuncture, chiropractic, water exercise, regular walking, varieties of dietary approaches, energy treatment such as Reiki and Jin Shin Jyutsu, yoga, meditation, talk therapy and the list goes on. Some things helped in the short term, nothing helped in the long run.
I had reached a place of no hope when I bumped into the MP in a short letter to CIIN, a newsletter for chemically injured people. After reading through this site, I talked with our doctor about what I understood of the treatment. She looked at the drug list and was very comfortable prescribing them to me and my family. She also knew of no other treatments to offer us, so was more than happy to let us try this one out. She saw nothing in the information that raised any red flags for her, so we began Aug. 7, 2007.
It was a leap of faith on my part. After fifteen years of disappointment, this was an act of sheer desperation. And I haven't been absolutely confident that the MP would create wellness for me these last two years, despite bits and pieces of improvement. One becomes accustomed to a life of illness, disability and failure to heal. So I didn't know if this would work for me. What if it worked for others, but my body wouldn't respond?
It took me a long time to even begin to understand any of the science behind the treatment. I wasn't a science major before I became mentally befuddled by my illnesses. And after illness owned me, I no longer had the faculties to grasp what Dr Marshall and others were teaching about the MP. So I took the leap on faith with what I did understand and with hope with what I didn't.
After all, what did I have to lose? At the time, MCS was being considered a death march and my CFS was only worsening, despite a few improvements that wouldn't stay. I couldn't leave the house without my respirator mask to filter the world's exhaust, hair products, laundry products, perfumes, dry cleaning fumes, and so forth. With time, I wasn't able to leave home at all, nor handle groceries fresh from the store, or be around people who'd been to work and hadn't showered and changed clothes yet. Eventually, I couldn't sleep in the same room as my husband as the chemicals gassing off his skin were too strong for me.
Before starting the MP, my CFS had improved somewhat. I'd gone from sleeping or lying in bed for 16-20 hours a day and shifting to the couch for the rest of the day, to needing a nap every afternoon and going to bed at 8pm every night. But the exhaustion still completely owned me.
As my physical abilities worsened, so did my mental capabilities, until I became so depressed, desperate and ill, life held very little quality despite being deeply loved by my husband and three daughters. One becomes locked inside a damaged body in pain and illness, and life feels like a prison.
In addition to dealing with extreme chemical sensitivities and chronic fatigue, the slow bleed stroke back in the beginning had left me with extensive long and short term memory damage, information processing damage, co-ordination troubles, left side/right side motor skills differences. My short term memory was destroyed completely. And though it seemed that all long term memory was wiped out as well, time proved that pieces could be retrieved. Looking at photos and talking with the family about past events would sometimes trigger chunks of lost life. But I was no longer the same woman.
In the beginning, I did not know my name, the children's names, or the words for things like toast or shoe. I had to relearn how to tie my shoes and pull a zipper. I could walk, but working a can opener was impossible. I could read, but couldn’t remember the sentence to move onto the next. I've been fighting back ever since and made extremely large gains over the years. But my short term memory and ability to focus on learning new skills, then retaining that information, has been the most stubborn to respond, despite fierce attention to fix that.
I'd gone from a vital mother of young children to a complete invalid who couldn't interact with the world, wasn't the person I'd known my whole life, and I was never free of illness, disability or pain.
The first year of the MP wasn't easy. Wearing NoIRS, putting tin foil on the windows, darkening the house, learning how to cope with IPs, accepting that I'd feel worse before I'd feel better while I was still extremely ill, it seemed insane to embrace such a tough treatment when it wouldn't miraculously fix me in five weeks.
One of the most difficult challenges to the MP was my inability to control my internal environment. It is normal for a very sick person to feel powerless in the hands of their illness. Sick people don’t get to dictate their daily realities. When you've coped with your particular illness long enough, you gain tricks to give you a sense of control. Even though control is an illusion, as the illness continues to gain complete autonomy inside your body. Surfing IPs while learning how to pace my meds didn't make me feel more powerful, it made me feel more victimized by my illness. That first year of the MP was a misery for me. But I stuck to it because I knew I was without other options. And I was gaining a better understanding of the science behind the treatment. Plus, I love my family and being alive too much to give up.
My stubbornness held me up when some days nothing else within me could.
And then this past Spring I turned a corner and finally the MP information and videos made perfect sense. I'd gained enough mental clarity and ability to focus, the information suddenly clicked inside me and I knew the protocol would work. Work at least for others. One can't stop illogical terror from holding firm. So I continued learning what medication amounts and combinations worked for me, and I kept going.
By the beginning of Sept this year, I realized that I wasn't gasping for air as I pulled myself up the stairs inside the house. That some days, I was trotting up instead! And that though I spend most of the day on the couch, I rarely lay down before bedtime and I have the consistent energy to get through my chores of prepping and cooking dinner, doing laundry, cleaning house. I also walk the dog every single day, seven days a week, no matter the weather, no matter how rotten I feel. Oh, sure, I feel exhausted most of the time, but there would be days, sometimes several days in a row, where I had energy unlike I've known for the past ten years.
After a 7 year absence from the eye doctor and the dentist, I knew this summer that I was finally well enough to go see them for check ups. I knew I wouldn't seize in the chair as a reaction to their body and business products. I knew I could go and that there'd be a price to pay for my body, but that I'd survive and, even better, continue to heal. To my delight, I’d grown back gums that had receded badly before the MP.
Then a month ago, I noticed that I wasn't having the usual struggles with my knitting. I wasn't making the same amount of mistakes, the pieces were looking more professional, and my speed of start to finish was improving. Initially, I thought it was a temporary improvement as you get used to the ebbs and flows of the body's responses to the protocol.
Early on, after my stroke, I took up knitting as a rehabilitation tool. It was my job to challenge my brain to rewire through repetitive movement and constant learning of new skills and techniques. Only stubbornness has kept me at it, as knitting requires focus in all the areas I have been deficient. Both eyes must focus up close and at the same time. Eyes must be able to switch from knitting in lap to instruction book on table. Brain must understand technique explanation in book and retain information long enough to implement into knitting. Both hands must co-operate at the same time, with the same speed. Long term memory is used as there are a wide variety of skills needed for anything more complicated than a place mat. Short term memory is used to stay within the pattern needs, stitch by stitch and row by row.
The short term memory damage has been the worst of the knitting experience. It creates enormous amounts of time lost as I rip out, reknit, rip out, and reknit what I'm working on until I am a mess of frustration, rage and tears.
It has been very frustrating and difficult, and our three daughters grew up hearing more curse words than they might have if I'd just sat like a lump and not fought back. Post stroke syndrome often leaves a person unable to contain their emotions and I have often behaved like an overwrought 4 year old with Tourette's.
A baby sweater used to be impossible for me to create. Then it would take me 7 months to make and look terrible. Then gradually 3 months and look like a 9 year old made it. Then, three weeks ago, I made one in two weeks. I was ecstatic. And this weekend, I made one in two days.
Over the past month, without any sign it was coming... I can knit properly! I remember where I am in the pattern, make no mistakes that need correcting, the flow of the knitting is even, and the end product looks professional and beautiful.
This is the MP in action. I have been pushing against this wall for 17 years with very little signs of improvement. If time and persistence would have given me these skills, I figure that it would have happened long ago. For the past seven years, there has been no distinct improvement beyond the development of tricks for working around my damage and the growth gained in forgiving myself for flares of temper tantrums and tears. I've become more patient with the process and with facing difficulty, but until this past month nothing has budged with my neurology.
With that realization of what's improved, I took stock of the rest of my challenges and found that I have a consistent amount of energy, despite weather, despite changes in amounts of sleep, despite chemical exposures. I can now count upon a certain amount of energy and mental ability, and this is a first. Chronic fatigue syndrome no longer completely owns my life. Instead, it has become a constant partner, which is a big difference, and I am thrilled!
Fibromyalgia flares are a rare event. I’d even forgotten that it was once a daily issue for me.
This past year, it has become routine for pre-cancer skin biopsies to consistently come back clean with a significant decrease in the number of spots to check.
And though MCS is still my most significant illness, the seizure reactions to exposures are less frequent. My chemical tolerance has improved enough that once in a blue moon, I can go to town, eat in a restaurant or go to a museum as long as they have great air return. Exposures to vehicle exhausts create much smaller reactions. If I walk into a cloud of laundry product in the air, my sinuses scream, but I can still make it home.
My body is still unhappy, but I am not. I can't wait to see what heals over the next year. I finally live in the land of Always Hopeful. 
So THANK YOU, MP!!! Thank you, Dr Marshall!!
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MCS, CFS, FM, CS, DH, stroke neuro, seizures, skin ca, IBS, eczema, irregular heartbeat| NoIR avoid light and D| Sept 21/07 25D-40.8ng/ml| May 7, 07 1,25D-35.8pg/ml
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Joyful
Foundation Staff
| Joined: | Sat Jun 9th, 2007 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 2246 |
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Posted: Wed Oct 28th, 2009 09:35 |
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Wow. Wow. Wow.
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MP Stories | Bacteriality | MP Search | MP Knowledge Base
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Karon
Member in Phase 3
| Joined: | Thu Nov 15th, 2007 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 74 |
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Posted: Wed Oct 28th, 2009 15:27 |
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Good Morning Juanita, 
Every Morning I read these sites like most others on this planet read the news paper. It has become (for over 1 1/2 years) my morning ritual. I am at my best in the morning for reading and remembering as well as connecting. Plus......there is no one else up and the time is mine. I Cherish my quiet time with the MP and other MP sites. They have kept me connected and in a constant state of learning!
I am addicted to say it truthfully.....
Your post is the highlight of my morning.......THANK YOU!
Good or bad,,,,,please don't ever stop.
Your progress brought tears of joy to my eyes. I am so very happy for you and your whole family......for they have YOU back!
I can't imagine suffering, (as so many here have) for so long. 
I suffered with PTSD and depression for 10 years with no physical symptoms until May of 07. Then RA hit me hard and fast and took me down. It brought me here. Then the puzzle pieces fell into place. I have seen/felt amazing healing in just 16 months as well as watching my son heal even quicker. Now its my daughters turn, and she is moving right along on just Beni right now. 
I wonder if your family will be joining you on this journey.?
I KNOW for sure that the sooner the killing and cleaning begins the easier the MP will be.
There are not more than 5 things that I know for sure in this life, and this is one of them.
I am so proud of you and your progress...What strength you have!
You Go Little Mama...show us whatya got!
Love from your MP sis
Karon in Ca.
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LYME,PTSD,RA,CFS,ChronInflamDisease,
Depression/Anxiety
Naproxen/Tramadol/Valium/Flexiral/Otc sleepaid, PRN
|125D =73 25D=20(May08)| 25D=14.4(Jul08) 25D=14(June09)
[PH1-Apr08| [Ph2-Aug08] [Ph3-Apr09]
Lowlux Home Work NoIRS NoSun covered up
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Marber144
Member in Phase 2
| Joined: | Wed Mar 5th, 2008 |
| Location: | Connecticut USA |
| Posts: | 93 |
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Posted: Wed Oct 28th, 2009 15:33 |
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Juanita,
Thank you for your great summary… Wow!
We all share so much accumulated Th1 ‘stuff’ (bacteria, of course!).
You are a little ahead of me in writing & cognitive functioning. Seems like we both tried a similar holistic & main-stream medicine ‘list’ before MP.
Thank you to all who: read, comment, moderate, and share experiences on MP.
It feels so good ~ to feel so good! Always Hopeful is wonderful, Juanita.
With my whole-hearted gratitude to Dr Marshall & the many other supporting scientists,
Martha
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Lyme Bart Babs Erlich Dx'00| DDD&HashimotoDx'01| OA Dx'90| HTN Dx'99|FM Dx'03|ApneaDx'06| Levoxyl Mucinex| 25D:Mar08/Jul08/Oct08/Jan&Apr09/Oct09= 14/20/11/9/7 ~125D:60 ~~~Beni:Jun08 Ph1:Jul08 Ph2:Aug08 ModPh2:Aug09~~~
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Juanita
Member in Phase 3
| Joined: | Thu May 3rd, 2007 |
| Location: | Alberta Canada |
| Posts: | 287 |
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Posted: Wed Oct 28th, 2009 17:27 |
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Hi, All. Thank you for the feedback. Like Freddy says... We're all in this together. *smile*
I want to add to my improvements list.
I had a missing fourth beat in my heart. It was discovered after surgery at the age of nine to remove a site of infection that sat over my right shoulder blade. No one knows how I developed a bag of pus the size of a grapefruit and they got to it before it could burst. But that's when the doctors found my arrhythmia. I'd always thought that they broke me and felt rather angry about that. But, then... I was only nine.
It was finally documented with a 12 lead EKG the summer of 2006 as my chest began to hurt during the whoosh of the missing beat. Stress was decided to be the culprit. But I was understandably freaked out, feeling my health was totally moving in the wrong direction.
I'd been on the MP one year and two months when my last EKG in Oct 2008 showed that I have my fourth beat back. There is now no electrical misfire at all.
I say it's the MP and my doctor smiles at me with amazement and delight. She doesn't disagree, she just doesn't know. But nothing else is new. I had been following Heart Health guidelines for twenty years before the MP and that hadn't fixed the arrhythmia. The only change is the protocol.
It turns out that on my father's side of the family, there is a documented defect within the fourth valve of the heart. My father and my two uncles had heart issues that needed repair. I didn't learn this until after I'd passed my EKG.
I had another improvement to add today, but it has slipped my mind. Ha!
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MCS, CFS, FM, CS, DH, stroke neuro, seizures, skin ca, IBS, eczema, irregular heartbeat| NoIR avoid light and D| Sept 21/07 25D-40.8ng/ml| May 7, 07 1,25D-35.8pg/ml
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