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| Joined: | Sat Jul 10th, 2004 |
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Posted: Fri May 30th, 2008 06:30 |
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The MP does not guarantee a “time to a cure”, but it does provide a pathway to a cure together with mileposts along the way. Everyone’s journey will be unique, determined by their disease, their history, and their execution of the MP.
You do not have an inexhaustible supply of bacteria…they will all be killed in time, releasing their toxins into your system as an indicator of their demise.
Your recovery does not follow a gradual trend of feeling better. It can have spikes of very bad pain as you change antibiotics and doses, and start killing more and different bugs in different places.
Your perception of your progress toward eliminating the disease is distorted by the very disease itself, working to befuddle your reasoning, your attitude and your hope.
Everything that you are experiencing is predicted by the MP. If you were not experiencing these things, you would have cause to question the treatment and the science.
Despite all seeming contradictions to your recovery, you are slowly but surely eliminating this disease.
Everything is unfolding as it should.
~Phil Schoner
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The MP is like climbing Everest; you can't run up the hill, you can't even run back down the hill. You put one foot carefully in front of the other in a mind numbing trudge and you keep going. It's slow. You'll lose faith from time to time. But you keep going. You'll curse your fate and think it's unfair. But you keep going. You'll give up activities you love (for now). But you keep going. You'll have days where you can't even remember what it's like to feel normal. But you keep going. You will find strengths and weaknesses you never knew you had. But you keep going. You will gnash your teeth and rend your garments in the best Old Testament tradition. But you keep going.
That's the reality. It's a book that allows no reading ahead. The punishment for rushing or cheating is something you won't want to repeat. Slow and steady is the only way you can get through this. You can live an even fuller life when you are well, to make up for all you sacrificed to get there. When in doubt, curl up in a 30 lux room with a good book and put another day of the MP under your belt. Every day is a victory. Every morning at breakfast, you shove a grapefruit into the face of Death, just like Jimmy Cagney. 
It's two years to the day for me on the MP. I'm beat up, run down, and sorely vexed. But every day is a victory. And I keep going.
~Knochen
Dr Marshall:
Nobody has dropped out of our study because of kidney failure, or because their heart muscle has weakened, or their lung capacity has diminished.
By all means, ask Doc to measure these for you, but the real reason that you are having trouble, and that others drop out of the study, is that their brain starts playing tricks on them.
Earlier this year Meg, Amy and I gave presentations at a conference "Cognitive Dysfunction in Disease" at the home of the Nobel Prize organization, Karolinska Institute in Sweden. The difficulties you are experiencing are as a result of the disease process.
You need to cut back your IP, but primarily to allow your brain the ability to reason again. To get a grip on reality again. To plan about walking your daughter down the aisle at some time in the future. To plan what you want to do with your life when these bacteria have been defeated and you get your life back again.~
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